So I was watching this Indian movie called “Chennai Express” and I was guided to an epiphany. And it wasn’t because of Deepika Padukone. Okay, not only because of Deepika Padukone. I thought to myself, how long before we start making movies which actually make some sense?! I have to admit, there have been some intelligent movies that have been made in the past five years, but dismally, we’re still not there. That prompted me to do a list of some things I think Indian movies should stop showing . Like, banish them forever.
Here we go:
1. Save me the horror
Portrayal of Gay Stereotypes
Wow where do I begin. Not every gay man has a death-obsession with bright pink and talks with a slight bend of his hand. Snip it.
Not all South Indians keep saying “Aiyyo” at the drop of a hat. Not every East Indian is a tea stall owner. Not every Gujarati thinks about garba every two and a half seconds. It’s disrespectful and regressive.
3. Diya Bujh Gaya
Vulnerable portrayal of women
For once, can’t the heroine be kicking butt and doing dhishum-dhishum to the bad guys while the hero lights a diya in the temple as strong breeze caresses his forehead?
4. No G(r)and Masti
Tacky Adult comedies
Yes I know we owe this genre to our overrated Hollywood. (Sorry America, someone had to say it). But at least they know how to do it proper. For how long can we ogle at jiggling assets and laugh at double meaning slapstick jokes. (Fellow men, please think with your brains, nothing else).
5. Baby doll Badnaam Hui
Even if I wasn’t against coordinated dance performances which come across fake and tedious, I’d still say item songs are a waste. If they take the story further, fine. But what if the movie doesn’t have a story in the first place? When they’re used as a medium to sell the movie to us masses, you have to stop and think. Majority of our population can operate a mobile or computer and can watch Katrina Kaif dance in bare minimums if they want to, at home.
Having said that, credit is due. Our movies have grown in a magnanimous manner and owe their success to virgin talent that is tapping into a spectrum of concepts, genres and screenplays. For an industry that is barely 100 years old, and was industrialised 16 years ago, we’ve done well. If we disregard our rivalry (or supposed rivalry) with Hollywood and aim at meaningful cinema, not only will we create a loyal fan base locally, but also a global connect.