How to make a viral Video ft. Rakhi Sawant

I’m such a Rakhi fan, I couldn’t resist but to have her on my blog. Who better to learn from when it comes to going viral on the Internet. When I finally contacted her after a ton of networking, RS’ response was simple. ‘This is chitting,I don’t know you and I will not help you‘. Rakhi-low key-dissed-me. But given just how much I’m in awe of her several talents, it only made sense to go ahead with the idea. Because I’m sitting alone in my room watching Netflix while my cat licks my toes. Clearly, I’m best suited to teach you a thing or two about being popular…Let’s go. 
1. Have no clue

If you’re going to know anything about what you’re making a video about, you might as well stop. Abort mission effect immediately. How are you going to be taken seriously if you don’t sound clueless and retarded? You need to sound awkward, ill informed, out of place. Add some random pauses in the camera, maybe even open your eyes wide at regular intervals. Stare into the abyss, spasm occasionally. Just don’t come across normal or sane. Pinch yourself every time you state a fact. Or just cut the footage. God forbid you actually know what you’re talking about. The horror. 

  

2. Don’t make any sense 

At no price are you allowed to make any kind of sense. Dumb yourself down. Rakhi will attest my words. Mispronounce words, speak illogical. Never ever are you allowed to construct a meaningful sentence. You should come across confused. Maybe just call out the government randomly or recount a personal narrative when it doesn’t seem relevant. If we haven’t established it earlier, relevance and link are not your friends. Steer clear the minute you feel like you’re being relatable or you think people can understand you. That is not the right way to go. 

  
3. Tears galore 

Okay so let’s be honest. You shouldn’t even want to make a viral video if you can’t cry on cue. You’re better off with your normal job or education. You aren’t cut out for the tedious lifestyle of a viral vlogger. If you’ve seen bae’s recent press conference you know just how comfortable she’s shedding ‘aasu‘ on camera. What helps me is always having a sad personal memory that would help me get in touch with my emotional facet. (If nothing helps, think about what you’re doing with your life aspiring to make a viral video. Your low ambitions should be enough to bring about a tear or two.)

  

4. ‘Quote’ cases

Step 4 is of utmost importance. This doesn’t need much explanation. You have to be witty, sassy and funny. If there’s one thing Queen Rakhi has taught us, it’s always bring your ‘A’ Quote game. You could use the following spurts of gold provided to us by RS as inspiration: 

– Jo Bhagwan Nahi deta, woh doctor deta hai.

– Sabne chitting ki hai.

– Is you make joke of me? 

– Jinka naam Google pe Nahi Hota, main unki baat Nahi karti. Next please.

The more nonsensical and bizarre, the better. You want your viewers to be disgusted, disappointed and plain sad. 

  
5. Show ‘CLAVAGE’

Cleavage is so 2009. Clavage is the real deal. Minions, please notify the Oxford Dictionary the change in pronunciation of the word. How will you go viral if you don’t show skin? Whether you’re a guy or a girl, skin show is a must, okay? Because who cares if you say something smart, solve a global problem, build a machine to reduce pollution, only your ‘clavage’ matters. You should listen to all the low life mongrels who tell you to strip to be popular because there is no other way. 

  
I hope I’ve persuaded you enough to go viral. All you need is lack of mental faculty and to own a video camera. The latter is optional. The former, not so much. 

  

Bollywood roundup

I’m so excited to have my friend Disha Sodha over at the blog. D is going to be doing a monthly Bollywood review and I’m so glad I’ve finally found someone who’s nearly as obsessed with Hindi cinema as I am. Have at it. 

Hey y’all. This is my monthly round up of everything B-wood. I hope you find it fun. 

PRIYANKA AT OSCARS,2016.   At the Oscars, held on 28th February, California, Priyanka was spotted wearing a strapless white gown by Zuhair Murad that perfectly embraced her curves, with diamond jewellery by Lorraine Schwartz and a clutch. She finished off her look with her hair tied back in a ponytail and a red lip.

   Later, for the Vanity Fair Oscars Party, she slipped in a shimmery grey dress, again with her hair tied in a ponytail with minimalistic makeup.

  She looked stunning! Don’t we all agree?

Which look do you prefer? Well, I love the former!

   
    Priyanka has started shooting for her Hollywood debut movie Baywatch alongside Dwayne Johnson and Zac Efron, where she will be playing a negative role. It will be released on May 19, 2017. Who’s excited?

 

KAPOOR AND SONS
   Kapoor and sons is a great family drama that hit the theaters on the 18th of March starring Alia Bhatt, Siddharth Malhotra, Fawad Khan, Rishi Kapoor, Rajat Kapoor and Ratna Pathak.

   The audience has been raving about the movie! The film is about a dysfunctional family and takes you through varied emotions of being happy, sad, heartbreaking, love, shock, fun, being realistic etc. It is an emotional roller coaster, precise, intense and a lovable movie with a wonderful ensemble.

  A must watch!

  Also, can we take a minute to appreciate how cute these three look in the picture.❤😭

   

HT MOST STYLISH AWARDS The HT most stylish awards were held on March 20, in Mumbai. The red carpet was laid and Bollywood celebrities like Shah Rukh Khan, Rekha, Sanjay Dutt, Anil Kapoor, Amitabh Bachchan, Alia Bhatt, Katrina Kaif, Sonam Kapoor, Parineeti Chopra, Siddharth Malhotra, Varun Dhawan and others graced in. The actors were dressed at their best and redefined the latest trends and their style.

We are all looking forward to the winners.

   

  

  

 

TIMES OF INDIA FILM AWARDS (TOIFA)

 

   TOIFA is an event that felicitates Bollywood fraternity and takes Bollywood at a global level that popularizes the industry. It is held at international places for about 3 to 4 days. This year, Toifa Technical Awards were held on March 17th and the Red Carpet and Main Awards were held on the 18th of March at Dubai International Sports Stadium.

    There are dance performances by the actors like Varun Dhawan, Salman Khan, Kareena Kapoor and many others to look forward to. So let’s have a look at the Bollywood stars on the big night.

   
  

 

KI AND KA

     Ki and Ka released on the 1st of this month. It has a unique and a very unusual concept. It is a new, different and an innovative story which attracted a lot of audience. The movie stars Kareena Kapoor as Kia and Arjun Kapoor as Kabir. The film also has cameo appearances by Amitabh Bachchan and Jaya Bachchan.

  Kia is the man of the house and Kabir is a house maker. The movie supposedly was to be focused on gender equality. However, even with a strong storyline and great performances the movie has received mixed reviews by the critics. The movie is believed to have an average execution.

   The role reversal was surely a fun concept but could have been more impactful on screen.

     

DEEPIKA PADUKONE’S HOLLYWOOD DEBUT!
    Deepika is all set to make her Hollywood debut opposite Vin Diesel in the third installment of xXx: The Return Of Xander Cage, an action flick directed by D J Caruso. Deepika plays Serena in the film and had once mentioned in an interview that she feels proud to be a part of this movie where she gets to flaunt her ethnicity. The film also stars Nina Dobrev, Samuel L Jackson, Ruby Rose, Jet Li and Tony Jaa. Nina, Ruby and Deepika all in the same frame, like what more can you ask for? 

     The pictures shared from the sets look so deadly and Deepika looks so stunning!

The film is set to have a 2017 release.

      All Deepika fans would be super excited for this new venture!

   
   
 

 

I hope you guys enjoyed the post. Which was your favorite part of the blog post and what are you most excited for? Let us know in the comments below 😉

 

Thankyou.

 

Love x

 

Disha Sodha.

Two year Anniversary

Hello! We meet again. It’s been two years since I started blogging and Akash Kumar Existence is two years old. I thought I’d write about my experience and things like that, but no, this is a blog, not a snooze fest, or worse Awards Acceptance speech. Instead, I’m doing a ‘Types of Bloggers’ you might come across. You don’t have to be a blogger or a writer to identify with the post, I’m sure given how convenient starting a blog is, you know dozens of them. So leggo. 5 types of bloggers and the things they say! 
1. The one-post wonder 

I am a writer and I shall change my Instagram bio and Facebook and let everybody know that I write. But what do I have to show for it? One blog post that everybody loved but I just got too bored to follow up. The mundane isolation and routine of a blogger got a lil’ too much for me and I’m going to let my legacy rest at one post, because it’s better than all your posts put together. So yeah. Go away.
2. The carefree blogger

Deadline is who? Meetings are who? Reaching on time for an interview is who? Proof reading is who? I don’t know this world and I have nothing to do with it. The world should exalt with appreciation over my efforts, who cares about the rest? I’m skating through life and the least my audience can do to help me is acknowledge my humongous talent and not ask for more. Don’t push it before I act out. I’m almost Amand Bynes at this point of the semester. 
3. The Excited Blogger

What are you doing for lunch?

 ‘I’m a blogger’.

What do you wanna do day after?

‘I’m going to be blogging!’

Dude do you wanna go to the movies?

‘Nahhh I gotta finish up my blog post’.

I’m like super busy right now with my blog and I just have so much work to do. I might not be posting anything anytime soon but I still have to tell everyone within a 100 metre radius that I have a blog and I am a blogger and I write blog posts on a regular basis. You should totally check my blog out, it’s actually really good. B L O G.

4. The ‘social media’ blogger 

Okay so let’s be clear. I’m not just a writer or a blogger, I’m a celebrity who has a responsibility. Everyone on my Facebook, Twitter, Instagram and Snapchat must know I’m alive and I’m hence going to spam you with every detail of my (in my head, interesting) life. You should just be glad I choose to share it with you. Just embrace the roller coaster but don’t have too much fun because I’m the blogger and I’m supposed to be the one having fun and you’re just a mere spectator. So go back to your corner. 

5. The ‘Collab whore’ blogger 

I just randomly pick up strangers from the street and collaborate with them because haven’t you heard? One is better than two. Unless it’s a Sexually transmitted disease. I pick up more people than effin Amy Schumer from Trainwreck. I’m never too sure of my own work and so I’m going to ask any body I know who can construct a grammatical sentence to write a piece for my blog. Hold up, I see someone on the subway, got a few questions to ask him. I have a Collab week coming up…

So that’s that. To be honest, I’m actually all of these people! Comment below which your favourite one is. 

This has been a crazy journey and I have some super exciting interviews and collaborations coming up. Here’s to many more years of me disappointing you with my sub standard content. Yay you.